Grief

I lost a family member on Monday.

For some reason, it didn't kick in until tonight in the shower. It kicked hard. I wasn't expecting it.

I literally haven't had the chance to eat anything today, but I don't feel like dinner. I'm browsing the internet, but I don't really have a website in mind. I have conjunctivitis in both eyes, and they used to hurt earlier today, but now they don't. Same for the turf burn on my knee. I just want to go to sleep.

The last time I felt this bad I was in sophomore year, when my last rat Cookie died. Then, I stumbled around the block, probably looking very drunk and unsteady. I can't do that now. I can't do anything now on this stifling campus.

I don't like grief. Make it go away.

This was his favorite song.

Gentle On My Mind, by Glenn Campbell.