Can't Look Up

What are the characteristics of a bad student?

1. Doesn't do/put effort into homework.
2. Doesn't show up to class.
3. Sleeps/dozes/daydreams during most of the day.
4. Refuses to study.
5. Procrastinates constantly.
6. Rude and distractingly loud.
7. Often refuses to follow/ignores directions.
8. Sasses the teacher and laughs about it afterwards.
9. Tries to pass off a missed deadline on a lame excuse.
10. Cheats off other students.

According to my list, I am 35% bad student. Nope, nope, nope, from what I remember of freshman year I was 15% bad student. My life has gone from average student to borderline SENIORZZZ mania. It's only a few more months before I start cutting class. Oh god, never never never. I can't believe I would even think that. What is senior year doing to my mind?

But in all seriousness, my academic life has taken a nosedive and reverse engines are failing to initiate. I'm praying that I make it through my finals. I'm praying I get into a good enough college. I'm praying I make it through my finals so I stay in a good enough college. Why do I feel so much pressure to get into a good school - and not just a good school, but a good one that people have heard of? You hear what everyone says, "just because they aren't as popular doesn't mean they're not as good." Well, yes, they can be acceptable, but the whole reason that you hear about good schools is because they produce good students, and you don't hear about the "good" schools because they don't produce as many.

I would count it as a failure on my behalf if I didn't get into a reasonably well known school, and instead got into some place out in the nowheres. When people ask me where I'm applying, I don't want to feel a sense of shame listing my schools that I applied to; I want to say a reputable name instead of having to tell people in which state a college is when they ask for my list. But I can't help it, I can't tell people the name of a high-ranking college without feeling like I was being judged, like they're thinking, "Wow, that's a reach for her. I wonder why she's shooting so high for a place that's obviously going to reject her." I wasn't good enough.

It's shameful feeling like I'm the person with the lowest intelligence level in my close, immediate group of friends. The best places judge you on your grades (which is the definition of intelligence level in this case), not so much your personality, interests, dedication, so forth. Sadly, to me, those grade-oriented ones are the only universities that count.

I want so much. I wish for the day where I can be genuinely happy in my first choice college. I wish that my closest friends will get into colleges/universities close to mine, or that we stay in close contact for many years. Or that we even end up with a happy ending.

Call me Miss Sunshine.

Welwitschia (Welwitschia mirabilis)

On a past post I put this as one of my favorite plants. Now you get to know why!

Take a good look at that picture. How many leaves do you see?

The answer is two.

It's generally accepted that it was named after the Austrian botanist Friedrich Welwitsch, who first documented it. An adult welwitschia consists solely of two leaves, a stem base and roots.  Its two permanent leaves are unique in the plant kingdom, because they are the original leaves from when the plant was a seedling, and they just continue to grow and are never shed. As you can see, they instead bundle up into a deceptive octopus mass. The two leaves are leathery, broad, and strap-shaped (I can't think of a better comparison word) and they lie in a heap on the ground. The leaves shred at the ends into length-wise strips, due to time/wind/etc., but it soon grows back The stem is low, woody, hollowed-out, and sturdy. It usually grows to about 500 mm in height. The welwitschia is endemic to the Kaokoveld Centre in Africa, spanning part of the coasts of Namibia and Angola.

Cool Facts:

• Informal sources refer to it as a "living fossil."
•  It is the only genus in the family Welwitschiaceae and order Welwitschiales.
• This succulent plant (SUCCULENT KAROO, LOOK IT UP, IT'S AN ACTUAL PLACE) can live up to 1,500 years.
• It's thought to be a relic from the Jurassic era. It hasn't changed much since.

I want a relaxing song tonight, since I have too much homework to stress over, so have the first Italian song I ever heard. I assume you ( the reader) speak English, so I found a video with English subtitles. If you are a native-speaker of Italian and are learning English, yay, practice! If you don't speak English at all but speak Italian, then that last phrase was completely redundant. Enjoy one of the best songs of your language.

Vivo Per Lei, by Andrea Bocelli (feat. Giorgia)

Derailing from Track to Track

Winter is finally here! At least, as close as it gets to winter in California.

Senioritis has really hit me hard. Despite the fact that every single one of my classes are AP, I have no inclination to study or do the homework, as long as it's not due the next day. A lot of stuff gets piled up last minute, and sometimes I don't even finish all of that. I just turn it in partially finished, or find a way to make it look finished. I do feel bad about that - I've never been one to easily cheat. But I'm growing fed up with school. I've been continuously waking up much to early for too many years, studying hard for subjects I will never touch again in college, and putting up with the stress of confining myself into social acceptances, as every single teenager has done at least once in their lives. Yes, First World problems. For an angsty, angry teenager, that doesn't mean they're still not problems.

It's getting too cold to go back to Roost. As much as I love it, I love the warmth of my bed and my cup of hot chocolate better - especially when it's coupled with a good book. Lately I've started more books than I can finish. I checked out a book last week, and before I could finish it, checked out another one yesterday. This doesn't include the unfinished two from months ago, or my English Lit book Frankenstein, or the book I have yet to choose for my independent reading for school. OR the many others I have on my to-read shelf on Goodreads.

I never thought I would say it, but there are too many books in my life right now.

I also wish I had the motivation to continue a small side project story that I started with my best friend at the beginning of summer. It's wonderful to work on, but unless it's started right, I'll never have the energy to finish it. This has become blatantly obvious - I haven't touched that Google Doc in over a month now. I've always known about this flaw of mine, though. It happened whenever I was given a new piano piece to start on that I wasn't super enthusiastic about, and especially now in AP Studio Art, where we have to churn out top-quality work in a mere two weeks (when we are used to having two months to produce top quality work. What are stress?) I come up with an idea, but if it starts out looking funky, I give up almost immediately on fixing it and leave it lying around until the deadline the next day.

If I lay here, if I just lay here, would you lie with me, and just forget the world?
-Snow Patrol, Chasing Cars

*As I was re-reading my post, I realized how scattered the topics are, so that explains my title. It was taken from another one of my posts, I don't know which.

Glaucus Atlanticus (It has no commonly used common name)

If this is not the most beautiful thing you have seen today, then you need to tell me right now what was more beautiful (excluding your significant other/idol/pet/yourself).

Please, have another picture. Can I just show you a bunch of beautiful G. Atlanticus pictures and not list the facts?

Okok, I'm done.

The glaucus atlanticus is a species of sea slug. And as most sea slugs are, these are poisonous - a human picking one up may receive a very painful sting. How do you feel about the picture above now? There are also serrated teeth in those appendages. Talk about the thorn within the rose.

This nudibranch can grow up to 3 cm, and lives in temperate/tropical waters, mostly around the East and South Coast of South Africa, European waters, the east coast of Australia, and Mozambique. It preys on assorted sea snails and such, and the dangerous Portuguese Man o' War (it's ability to do so lies in it's concentrated venom, which is more powerful than the Man o' War's. Also, it's immune to the Man o' War's venom, and instead takes it in and saves it in sacs for its own usage). Occasionally, given the chance, g. atlanticuses are cannibals.

Cool Facts:

• Due to it's unique feeding habits, the g. atlanticus cannot be bred or held in captivity without quickly killing it. 
• Due to a gas-filled sac in its stomach, it floats upside down on the surface tension of the ocean.
• Much like the great white shark, the g. atlanticus has counter shading, which means (since the g. atlanticus floats belly up) the stomach is a darker shade, to blend in with the ocean's surface from an aerial POV, and the back is lighter, to blend with the sunrays shooting down through the water.
• The not-common-enough names include the sea swallow, blue angel, blue glaucus, blue dragon, blue sea slug and blue ocean slug.

 Because I was talking about not being grateful about my First World status, here's an appropriate song:

You, Me, and the Bourgeoise, by The Submarines